All About The Kidd

 

Aargh, the smell ol da sea, watchin a brit barge go unda, plundain, wenches, aargh, wenches. When I be a yungon, I wanted ta be a wee cabin boy foreverr. I had much respect for me Captain, loved the sea, and his two lovely daughters, aargh. I was referred to as da Kidd being short en al, my advantage, aargh. Well however, it be a tough job keeping the Captain's quarters clean and tidy as well as caring fer two very jealous girls. One alweyze wanted more den de other, so me got completely worn out many a time. Oh well, got to take da gut with da bad they say. Me ande those girls had a wee secret, aargh, they knew I was a man. Life was great, aargh. Mr Spilly was a spyin on us once. I put some black peppa ind his powda horn, aargh. One fine mornin I I awoke to find meself alone, in a skiff, and no ship in site. "What the . . ."I wonda who told me Captain I had grown up. I wanderred around in dat skiff fer days. One night I awoke with a start as me skiff thudded into da side olf a ship. I yelled up topside, "Pleese help me, sumboddy, helps me." Clingin to da ship me waited. It wasent long before a pretty face appeared above me. A voice could be heard above the waves sofley slappen the side of de ship, "Who ye be boy?" I answered that I be a shipwrecked cabin boy. I was a rescued.As I reached da bulkhed two nice wenches helpped me abbord. The Captain werse a nice lady too, aargh. A ship of women. What a blessing. I faked a faint so ta mull things ova in me head. Later I thought, I woould get ta know da crew well, very weell, and in many ways, aargh. Fer many a year I had a great time, replace da crew with many Kidds, until finally, da crew were aul Kidds. We were a pillagin, maullin, and be wreckin manny a town and barge all over da Indian Ocean. One dey me got at odds with me crew, me Kidds. All da women were old and used up. "What the . . ." Again I awoke in me skiff. I felt it was a time fer an attitude adjussment. I lost me ship and me familee. Everyone states that youll find thar be new adventures in every new town. I knew the same held true fer ships. I waited ta be rescued again, however, no more Kidds. I swearr. On the hor1zan I saw her, a marvalouse ship, not as large as sum, but a graceful ship it be, aargh. I heard da mate yell out, "ownly a Kidd Captenn. Want to jus sail on?" The Captain replied, "All kidds need a chance. Bring im aboard." I found meself on da MUST ROOS, aargh Contact Kidd

 

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